it's august. now what?

so i just arrived back in hoboken after today's sunday funday: toy story 3 w mama and sister and best friend's soccer game (they lost, boo) followed by a two hour ride home via multiple forms of public transportation.

however, only now can i finally reflect on the fact that it's motherfuckin' AUGUST. can anybody else not believe it? ugh, i don't know my thoughts about this. on one hand, i'm tired of sweating my bum off at 7AM because the humidity is so high. on the other hand, i'm simply not ready to almost be done with summer. i feel like i got nothing accomplished, and that's putting it rather lightly.

for some reason, i thought this summer was going to be awesome. i don't really know why i thought that because i'm not on break from school, nor did i plan on spending any time at the beach... but i just thought that i was in a really good place going into it and i'm afraid that i won't be at a good place coming out of it. i know i know, cry me a riverrrr. but seriously... i feel so behind this game we call life and i have no idea what i need to do to catch up to everybody else.

do i really have to tell myself to "stop trying" and "just let things happen"? BORING. whatever. i'm tired... and apparently bitter about, something. so i'm going to sleep.